Pass this cheerful message along or you'll fry in hell

I received a "friends quiz" recently in my inbox. The ones were you read your friend's answers to a bunch of inane questions and then erase those and put in your answers and pass it along to more friends. Actually, I was in a pretty good mood and I cared for the person who sent it so I played along. Sorry.

I'm not a big joiner in chain-type emails. I somehow doubt the Almighty is up there in front of the PC pounding out sweet little emails that threaten eternal damnation if you don't send it on in the next 5 minutes to closest 8 friends you could annoy and not totally alienate with this heaven-sent missive. God as blackmailer - via Internet no less.

Let's make up our own "friend's quiz" shall we!

Ques. #1: How many times in the past year have you wished Kelly Rippa would fall into a deep pit never to be seen again?

Ques. #2: Name the last 5 places your cat/dog barfed in your home.

Ques. #3: If you could sleep with anyone in the world, why aren't you?

Ques. #4: What did you want to be when you grew up?

Ques. #5: When the hell are you going to grow up?

Ques. #6: Have you ever been on America's Most Wanted?

Ques. #7: What is your favorite Income Tax form?

Ques. #8: How many moles do you have? What color are they?

Ques. #9: Chocolate or maggots?

Ques. #10: What friend do you think will send this back without telling you how pissed off they are that you wasted their time with it?